But this is so context based I sort of doubt a bitter near-misogynist who just started reading attraction advice would be able to implement it correctly.

I wouldn't give this advice to a bitter near-misogynist (and don't have a special interest in advising bitter near-misogynists, that doesn't usually work all that well anyway). I would give it to 'good boys' who are still under the impression that the polite supplication that sometimes works for keeping mommy happy is attractive to female peers. It opens up a whole new world to them.

why not say "Women find it attractive when men can confidently joke and be ironic about traditional gender roles without worrying about being offensive." And then give examples of this behavior and explain the counter-signaling going on.

Because I consider this tangent distinctly different from the original 'order them around' discussion. In particular, I don't think 'order them around' implies 'refer to them as bitches'.

(I didn't reject ChronoS' claimed evocation because the tangent is interesting and had no inclination to invalidate his contribution. For the purpose of your attempt to build upon that evocation as a shared premise I do reject it.)