wedrifid comments on The Nature of Offense - Less Wrong
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You could be right there. Primed by djcb's comment I was more considering "offense at the degree or nature of other people's obscenities" than "offense at deliberate attempt to insult". In the latter case I would replace "unprovoked" with "ill-advised". It potentially also removes the "faux-altruism", depending on whether it was you or your party member's who the insults were directed at.