Vladimir_Nesov comments on The Finale of the Ultimate Meta Mega Crossover - Less Wrong
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Robin Hanson wrote about a relevant phenomenon in Why Signals Are Shallow:
Thus, people can genuinely dislike their allies having an activity that gives shallow negative impression (feel the dislike, not just deem the activity a mistake), even if they understand this first impression to be incorrect, or that any person giving a minute's thought to the question will come to the same conclusion.
After re-reading that, and reflecting on my feelings reading the OP, I think my opinion of Hanson's signaling theories has gone up quite a bit.
This explains a LOT as applied to the feedback I get.
Money is just a proxy. Status makes the world go round.