Warrigal comments on Open Thread: December 2009 - Less Wrong
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I wrote a short story with something of a transhumanism theme. People can read it here. Actionable feedback welcome; it's still subject to revision.
Note: The protagonist's name is "Key". Key, and one other character, receive Spivak pronouns, which can make either Key's name or eir pronouns look like some kind of typo or formatting error if you don't know it's coming. If this annoys enough people, I may change Key's name or switch to a different genderless pronoun system. I'm curious if anyone finds that they think of Key and the other Spivak character as having a particular gender in the story; I tried to write them neither, but may have failed (I made errors in the pronouns in the first draft, and they all went in one direction).
Gur qrngu qvqa'g srry irel qrngu-yvxr. Vg frrzrq yvxr gur rzbgvba fheebhaqvat vg jnf xvaq bs pbzcerffrq vagb bar yvggyr ahttrg gung V cerggl zhpu fxvzzrq bire. V jnf nyfb rkcrpgvat n jbeyq jvgubhg qrngu, juvpu yrsg zr fhecevfrq. Va gur erny jbeyq, qrngu vf bsgra n fhecevfr, ohg yvxr va gur erny jbeyq, fhqqra qrngu va svpgvba yrnirf hf jvgu n srryvat bs qvforyvrs. Lbh pbhyq unir orra uvagvat ng gung qrngu sebz gur svefg yvar.
Nyfb, lbh xvaq bs qevir evtug cnfg gur cneg nobhg birecbchyngvba. V guvax birecbchyngvba vf zl zbgure'f znva bowrpgvba gb pelbavpf.
Alicorn goes right past it probably because she's read a fair bit of cyronics literature herself and has seen the many suggestions (hence the librarian's invitation to think of 'a dozen solutions'), and it's not the major issue anyway.