Human goals aren't going to sync up exactly with alien goals
Why not, as long as I'm making things up?
(or why even call them aliens?)
Because they are from another planet.
I do not know enough science to address the rest of your complaints.
Why not, as long as I'm making things up?
I'm worried that some of my concepts here are a little be shaky and confused in a way that I can't articulate, but my provisional answer is: because their planet would have to be virtually a duplicate of Earth to get that kind of match. Suppose that my deepest heart's desire, my lifework, is for me to write a grand romance novel about an actuary who lives in New York and her unusually tall boyfriend. That's a necessary condition for my ideal universe: it has to contain me writing this beautiful, beautiful novel.
I...
And happy new year to everyone.