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Nominull comments on A Suite of Pragmatic Considerations in Favor of Niceness - Less Wrong
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If you've ever tried to lead a group, you've probably encountered such a situation. Ruling by fear is not nice, but it is effective.
I've certainly been in situations where I wished I'd been more vocal, but there's a difference between being assertive--even commanding--and being mean.
Like anything, nice can certainly be taken too far.
I have honestly never seen it done by a person, though I have seen it done in a situation and I have seen people pretend cowardice is niceness.