I think a shorter term for what you're describing is positionality, the state where the quality of the good depends on its ranking relative to other goods. The problem you're claiming is that women's values are positional (making them non-mutually-satisfiable), while men's aren't (making them mutually-satisfiable).

But in any case, thanks for saving me the ordeal of telling women how the positionality of their values throws a big monkey wrench in everything ;-)