I think you raise some good points here.

I may have been encouraging people to "urge themselves to be especially upset" because that's a habit of mine, but you're right that it's not always a good idea to be emotionally upset when you can do nothing. What I don't like is this chain of events:

1. Something bad happens and we can't fix it.
2. You find some kind of detachment; you quit railing against the problem.
3. Detachment shifts to inevitability. You categorize the problem as not a problem.
4. When (later) someone proposes a possible solution, you reject the solution out of hand because you've already decided the problem is not real.

I think Stage 2 is fine; my problem is with Stage 3. The kinds of problems I'm talking about here are not literally impossible to solve; they're problems we don't know how to solve yet. Ideally, people who have stopped losing sleep and stressing out over a problem would still acknowledge and take seriously the fact that it is not a good thing. Put it off to one side, certainly -- but be prepared for the day that someone smarter than you has a good idea, and be willing to accept a solution if it arises.

Death is a good example of what I'm talking about, actually. Finding peace is a good idea. But I don't think it's good to be so wedded to acceptance of death that, if someone says "Here's something that might make people live much longer, or not die at all," you say "Well, that sounds like a bad idea. Death is a part of life."