Yvain comments on Open Thread, September, 2010-- part 2 - Less Wrong
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OkCupid thread, anyone?
I was thinking that those of us that aren't shy could share our OkCupid profiles for critique from people who know better. (Not that we have to accept the critiques as valid, but this is an area where it'd be good to have others' opinions anyway.)
If anyone wants to get the ball rolling, post a link to your profile and hopefully someone will offer a suggestion (or a compliment).
Also, I bet cross-sexual-preference critique would be best: which for most of us means gals critiquing guys and guys critiquing gals. But I realize the LW gender skew limits that.
Ah, sure. People (especially women), give me what help you can: http://www.okcupid.com/profile/ScottAlexander
1) I don't want to alarm you, but there's a tiger next to you.
2) I second the comments about your pictures. Get someone with a real camera to take some for you, smile when they do it, and then crop/balance them.
3) You made me giggle a few times; points for that.
4) I do too message men!
5) You get to goad the reader into asking you out and still have it sound like a joke exactly once. The second time it's desperate. (You do it once in the "message me if" and once in a photo caption.)
Where in CA are you from? :)
2) I am mostly using those pictures to signal that I do interesting things; generally, the more interesting the thing I am doing, the less likely I have a good photo of it (eg when trekking in mountains I became unshaven and poorly groomed and hideous and can only take pictures by holding the camera in front of my face). I'm not really sure how to fix that. Should I get rid of all my interesting pictures?
5) Meh, good point.
I'm from Orange County, but haven't lived there in a while.
Nah, you could just supplement them with tidier ones.
I get the sense that your profile content doesn't do you justice - perhaps you could afford to be more arrogant? No one you want to meet would find you boring.
I like most of your pictures, but I would include a few where you look more friendly and approachable, eg. pictures of you at work.
That's a brilliant piece of advice about the attitude to take when profile-writing. Don't worry about looking good to people you aren't interested in! It doesn't matter what they think!
Given the potential objections below about Yvain's work photos, a photo of him socializing might also fit the bill. Nothing says "I'm approachable" like "Look! These people clearly approached me, and I didn't bite them."
Yvain is a med student. Pictures of him at work might have him wearing a mask and up to his elbows in blood. Which would be interesting, but not approachable ;)
I realise he is a med student, which is why I suggested "at work". Maybe this is a personal quirk, but people in surgical scrubs exude compassion and approachibility to me. Conversely, pictures of people at work in an office setting usually seem impersonal and/or trite to me.
My dad (a doctor, although he doesn't practice as a physician and does consulting instead) wears scrubs as pajamas, so I don't trust my intuitions about what they mean one bit.
Perhaps I am alone in this, but the 2nd/middle picture looks terrible - as if you hadn't washed or shaved your head in a week.
I think the blurriness of your pictures makes you look less attractive. There was an OK Trends blog about this: http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/dont-be-ugly-by-accident/
I like it. I like the humor, I like the varied skills and interests.
Really like your "you should message me if" section. I would word it a bit differently, but definitely intriguing.
So the picture with the tiger is really you!