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David_Gerard comments on Defecting by Accident - A Flaw Common to Analytical People - Less Wrong
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Between strangers, 7. Between acquaintances or friends, variation but it would congeal into two large groups hovering around 6 and 4.
If you want to see 9s and 10s you have to look for certain types of unstable power dynamics.
Basically, I like LessWrong's approach because it feels more like 'friendship group where politeness of 4-3 is okay' and less like 'strangers you should be polite to'.