"What good rationalist techniques are there for changing such things?"

Carefully examining the potential reasons for going along with someone else. Emile's point below is a very good one.

'Obedience' implies that we must go along with what someone says we should do. It's much better to think (hopefully accurately) that we've choosing to do something which coincidentally is also what someone has suggested. We don't need to choose to obey to go along.

Carefully examining the justifications for actions is also important. If there are compelling reasons to do X, the fact that we've been "ordered" to do X is irrelevant, just as being ordered NOT to do X is.