I've been thinking about this on and off for an hour, and I've come to the conclusion that you're right.

Wow, this must be like the 3rd time that someone on the internet has said that to me! Thanks!

Although, if I were in that situation, and they did hate my guts, I'd rather know about it and find a way to remain confident that doesn't involve willful ignorance.

If you think of a way, please tell me about it.

I wonder, do all situations where instrumental rationality conflicts with epistemic rationality have to do with mental states over which we have no conscious control?

Information you have to pay money for doesn't fit into this category.