Because this and all my comments on it is getting downvoted already, I won't bother finish this and wish I'd never posted anything on it. Should I delete this thread or leave it as a monument to my own pathetic failure?

Please leave it open. It's a fun topic. Also, if I may stick my nose in and give some advice: instead of trying to control how people comment (title in bold, no values-destroying, provide specific details of how to do it) just let people say whatever.