IAWYC but I think you forgot to include something about jealousy in your analysis, even if few people would admit it's part of it.

I think it's very possible to greatly admire someone and at the same time feel some form of jealousy that inhibits the clear expression of that admiration. By saying that someone else is better (much better) than you are - especially at something that you value - you are in effect admitting to a lower status.

So all the forced disagreements and claims of independence are in effect just trying to signal that your status is high and you're not submissive, or something like that.