instead of saying that something's intrinsically difficult to communicate, say that most people suck at communicating it.
Why? It's not what's referenced in chaotic inversion - that's "chaos might actually be ignorance." Some things really do take more work to communicate than others, especially skillsets that will be different from person to person.
True, I probably should have been more specific, and it's even worse than your examples because there is no "this exact motion," and I am the swim teacher who says "see that bunch of people swimming over there? Try and do what they're doing for an hour."
I'll add a list of practice items in order of scariness, but I suspect that RawPower also could have made a similar list, and the trouble is more devoting the effort to doing them.
Real-world practice ideas, in rough order of scariness:
If invited to something, go.
Join a club.
Join a club that will require you to interact with normal people.
Play a drinking game.
Friend on facebook someone you know who hosts a lot of events (can find out by asking).
If in a room full of people, strike up three conversations within the next hour.
Ask an acquaintance to go grab lunch with you. Talk with them.
If you're walking in the same direction as someone on the sidewalk, strike up a conversation.
By the end of a practice conversation you should find out their name, what they do, whether they are enjoying the conversation (do not actually ask - use detective skills), and what their favorite dinosaur is (or a similar detail). Optionally you could find out about their general social lives, recent entertainment they've attended, if they have any big plans for the future, and if they have heard of [thing you like]. Extra credit - make up new things to find out that you think people would find interesting if someone asked them.
Invite several acquaintances out for lunch or dinner. Most will say no. Some will say yes.
Host a dinner party.
Get out on the dancefloor and do what you see other people doing.
Invite one to five acquaintances over to do an activity such as a videogame, a board game, or watching a movie.
Flirt with someone attractive. Make eye contact, make jokes, touch a bit more than normal.
Ask someone to dance. Dance.
Ask to trade cell phone numbers with someone. Call them a day to a week later with an invitation.
Ask an attractive person on a date. Take them to a restaurant, or to some sort of special event like a concert, or just cook a nice dinner and invite them over for a movie.
Communicate it with your words or with your body language that you want to kiss someone right now. If they go along, kiss them.
Communicate to someone that you want to have sex with them in the next ten minutes or so. If they go along, do it. Note: get expectations for sex and kissing from observing other people, helpful internet sites. Romantic movies and porn can be used, but only to extrapolate from, not to actually follow (especially with porn).
there is no "this exact motion"
Apply the chaotic inversion principle again. It's more likely that you don't know the required exact motion, but still try to teach people using your vague understanding.
So I was there being my rationalist-with-akrasia-issues, nerdy, awkward self who studies acting, singing, rhetorics, PUA, TV Tropes, Machiavelli, The Art of War, the 48 Laws of Power, the Art of Seduction, the Seven Habits... in the hopes of escaping his chronic fear of his neighbor (with some success, shall I add, but it comes slowly). And then I sumble upon this nice little harmless meme:
Socially Awkward Penguin
I was absolutely stunned. This behavior. I thought it was strange and unique. It's incredibly common. This gave me great hope. If it is common, it means it isn't due to noise: there's a pattern there, there's something to unravel. The misjudgements of power, of what it's right to do, of when to fear and when to be bold, when to speak and when to be silent... What *is* the right thing to do when you're with a coworker on an elevator? What do you say when someone remembers you, but you don't remember them, and they have noticed that? What do you do when you're hit by a paper ball in class? What do you do when the only people you seem to be able to make friends with are older, younger, or of the opposite gender, and you're utterly intimidated by people of your same age and gender, the friendship of whom you know would profit you most? Why do you automatically recalculate trajectories to avoid acquaintances in the hall, at the super, on the bus? Why is it that when a person of the opposite gender so much as pays attention to you, you think you have a crush on them?
There are clues to some of these questions in the books and works I linked back there. But, more often than not, we expect those problems to solve themselves, with one magical word, "confidence".
I am confused at that notion. I find it unsatisfactory. I want to understand social awkwardness. The rules thereof. And how to vanquish it. And I want the keys in a way that can be taught. So that, when I have kids, they don't have to go through the same stupid struggles and can actually feel good about themselves and focus on getting stuff done.
So, I hereby summon the powers of the Lesswrong community: let us pick apart this problem as we know so well, and let us unbury the roots of this evil that is social awkwardness, so that we nerds and geeks may defeat it at last, and live free of its funk.