Self control is an important element in influencing others, and as such it is central to negotiation theory. So is interpreting the world as it actually is. Clearly communicating one's desires without having them interpreted as anything more demanding than a request (i.e. NVC) is useful, but it is only one way to interact with people and will not always be ideal, even among those one is emotionally intimate with.

I didn't say negotiation and NVC didn't have areas of overlap, I said there were areas where their goals might be in conflict. Not the same thing. (I also didn't say that negotiation was always zero-sum, I said that zero-sum negotiation was an area where conflicts with NVC would likely exist.)

Compare the HNP core concerns, the Max-Neef needs, and the NVC needs inventory for more insight.

You could also look at my own SASS model, or the Murray-Bennett-Robbins models found in lots of self-help stuff. (See e.g. Robbins' TED talk about the six human needs.) There's also a recent 16-point needs model that lists all the same stuff, organized differently. (I don't remember the scientist's name right off, sorry.)

Pretty much every model of human needs ends up with the same big list, just grouped differently as far as categories. And what categorization you use really depends on what functional goals you have for applying your model, rather than there being any epistemologically "correct" classification. (Well, in theory, there's whatever physical groupings that occur in the brain or genome, but there's no point in waiting until we know that before we use the information we have.)

In general, when one is trying to train people to achieve some practical result, the best categorization to use is one that is both mnemonic, and closely tied either to the actions students need to take, and/or to the diagnostic/classification criteria they'll be using. So, HNP, NVC, and I can all have quite legitimate reasons for categorizing the basic needs differently, depending on what we intend to train people to do.