I don't know which possibility to lean towards, but if previously I only suspected LW was the wrong community for me (what with the singularity-worship that I don't share), now I'm almost convinced in this.

That's a shame. I hope that your dissonance with the community doesn't stop you reading and benefiting from the articles that don't touch on these subjects.

I also feel that you may have got a biased sample of LessWrong opinions, since those with stronger views are more likely to post. If you went to a meet-up and found similarly upsetting opinions to be the norm then that would be stronger evidence that the LessWrong community isn't for you. Again, I emphasise that you can benefit from LessWrong without identifying with the community. Just read the posts and remember the content which you find useful.