One doctor says this is iron deficient anemia

Do I really need to look at anything else you've written? Test the hypothesis! Surely she's had a blood test, and she really does have anemia. It is worth fixing, even if it isn't the only problem. Once it is fixed, she'll have fewer symptoms, which is helpful if there are unrelated problems. Anemia is usually easy to treat, with supplements. If they don't work, a blood test will indicate whether they're getting into the blood.