Thanks, but that all pretty much falls into the category of "general advice I've heard many times before" or "stuff I already knew", including the dark arts bit.

I'm not exactly sure how to link to a specific OKC profile, there doesn't seem to be an applicable URL that I can find. In lieu of that, my username there is DarkDaydreamer. I do log in semi-regularly because of the "online in the last <x>" thing, but the last time I edited my proflie or did more than glance at the Quiver, was at least a year ago.

The fact that you've even gotten one message is pretty promising.

I didn't know this, however (and if true, that's a bit of a self-esteem boost). But, it supports the notion that my problem lies in finding the right people in the first place; something I have had no success doing on OKC. And I would prefer not to go through a dating site anyway, if possible.

(I've been on Meetup.com a lot, but all the groups in my area are either religious-only, lesbian-only, women-only, deader than HDDVD, or about something I have absolutely no interest in. There's a really disproportionate number of those first three, too.)