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wedrifid comments on Neurological reality of human thought and decision making; implications for rationalism. - Less Wrong
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You're right of course. The cost to other people is far higher if they all message you. All for the slight benefit to you of not being publicly criticized.
Which may not even be a benefit. Being criticized publicly, and publicly responding to that criticism in a socially admired fashion, can be a net status gain.
Milking that kind of thing for status takes finesse but it is possible. Also useful for enhancing likability for those who already have high status.
(nods) Of course, for high-status individuals who are good at this particular maneuver it's also an opportunity to reinforce the public-criticism social norm, which increases their comparative advantage within the community.