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Armok_GoB comments on How I Ended Up Non-Ambitious - Less Wrong
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I'm honestly curious, how did you condition yourself to feel this way?
I mean, I think about the singularity, try to discount for my given bias (introverted young male in STEM field who read a lot of scifi) and I still conclude it is a worthwhile problem; but more importantly a problem that could use my skillset.
But I don't emotionally ... grok it, which makes me wonder if I really do believe it, or if it is belief-in-belief. I'm having my own struggle with ambition, and I'm at a point where I don't know if I actually care about anything. It seems that at my core, all my motivation stems from a desire for social status, which scares me.
Dunno. I seem to have had very powerful innate self modification capabilities in the past. Either I've lost them, or they are inaccessible to introspection in some very weird way.
The style of it is "brute, clichéd brainwashing", I literally can't imagine caring about anything else and it's not very good for my mental helth.