gwern comments on How would you take over Rome? - Less Wrong

25 Post author: Yvain 14 March 2012 04:24PM

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Comment author: gwern 15 March 2012 02:28:48AM 5 points [-]

Thanks for the vote of confidence. I mean, I have all my teeth, seducing an emperor should be a snap.

Don't be so sure. You've got some pretty severe competition. For example, Procopius, in his bitter Secret History, claims of Theodora (consort to Emperor Justinian) that in her days as a dancing girl/prostitute (before capturing Justinian's heart) she

"Often, even in the theater, in the sight of all the people, she removed her costume and stood nude in their midst, except for a girdle about the groin: not that she was abashed at revealing that, too, to the audience, but because there was a law against appearing altogether naked on the stage, without at least this much of a fig-leaf. Covered thus with a ribbon, she would sink down to the stage floor and recline on her back. Slaves to whom the duty was entrusted would then scatter grains of barley from above into the calyx of this passion flower, whence geese, trained for the purpose, would next pick the grains one by one with their bills and eat. When she rose, it was not with a blush, but she seemed rather to glory in the performance. For she was not only impudent herself, but endeavored to make everybody else as audacious. Often when she was alone with other actors, she would undress in their midst and arch her back provocatively, advertising like a peacock both to those who had experience of her and to those who had not yet had that privilege her trained suppleness."

Comment author: Alicorn 15 March 2012 03:29:40AM 8 points [-]

I don't actually think seducing an emperor would be a snap, it just seems more doable for an early-twenties female than raising an army.

Comment author: Vaniver 16 March 2012 10:32:39PM *  3 points [-]

Early twenties? You realize that you're almost a spinster, right?

Comment author: Alicorn 16 March 2012 11:12:59PM 0 points [-]

Yeah, I'd have to figure out how to lie about my age or work around it.

Comment author: Bugmaster 17 March 2012 01:15:44AM 3 points [-]

As far as I understand, you would look younger than your actual age to the average Roman, due to the vastly superior health care and nutrition that you'd enjoyed in modern times. So, you should be good on the age front.