Yeah, that's very possible. A story can be good even if there are people who don't like it. :-)
Though upon reconsideration, I do have to soften my judgement a little. That the first sentence says that the prince is auditioning for a mistress is interesting, and could have managed to get my interest if it had been followed up on quickly enough. But there's something about his boredom that's catchy - he's bored with the ceremony, so the reader gets bored with it as well. Or something, I'm not sure how reliable my introspection is here. :-)
I suspect you're picking up on the same thing that drethelin did: the heavy exposition dump that comes right at the beginning.
Some of that can and will be smoothed out, but yeah, the interest at the beginning is mostly supposed to come from the setting and the culture. So the reason I actually suggested the story is not for you was your offhand reference to "generic sci-fi/space opera setting." If you're sick of sci-fi and space opera conventions--if you're not the kind of reader who's approaching the set-up with some degree of interest just beca...
This community has a recurring interest in "rationalist fiction," and several members who are writers. I wonder if it would be useful to create a space where Less Wrong members could provide each other constructive criticism and encouragement on in-progress original writing projects?
Disclosure: I'm working on a sci-fi novel right now, and my regular circle of "beta readers" are fantasy fans and aren't providing much feedback on the new project. I am much, much more productive as a writer when I get steady feedback, so I have a personal interest in looking for something like this. Less Wrong came to mind as a community of intelligent, creative, forward-looking types who are likely to enjoy sci-fi.