I think I disagree with this because the brain is modular, an evolutionary hodge-podge of old and new subroutines each with different functions. Only a few of those modules are conscious, self-aware, deliberative thinkers capable of planning ahead and accurately judging the consequences of potential actions to decide what to do. The rest is composed of a series of unconscious impulses, temptations, and habits. When I say "I," I refer to the former. When I say "my brain", I refer to the latter.
And I am always trying to trick and manipulate my brain. If I'm on a diet, I'll lock the refrigerator door to make it harder to get a midnight snack. I'll go grocery shopping only when I'm full. I'll praise myself when I eat celery, etc.
Personally, I only identify with, approve of, and demand respect for those conscious, self-reflective modules, and the various emotions and habits that are harmony with them. And if someone who loves me wants to help me trick my brain into better aligning with my values, I'm all for it. Even if a particular technique to condition my brain requires that I don't know what they're doing.
And when it comes to reinforcing behaviors that align with my extrapolated volition ("What is OTOH likely to want to do, but is too scared/lazy/squicked out/biased to get herself to do?"), deliberate, considered, scientifically sound manipulation is probably better than the subconscious manipulation we all engage in, because the chances of getting undesired results are lower.
My objection is basically that it's disrespectful (to the point of being unethical) to do this sort of thing to someone without their consent. As with many such things, there are going to be cases where someone has not or cannot actually give consent, and so we have to ask whether or not they would do so if they had all the facts on the table. In these cases, it's a tricky question whether or not you can assume someone's consent, and it often best to err on the side of not assuming consent.
I notice that you put this in terms of someone you love manipulati...
Part of the sequence: The Science of Winning at Life
Also see: Basics of Animal Reinforcement, Basics of Human Reinforcement, Physical and Mental Behavior, Wanting vs. Liking Revisited, Approving reinforces low-effort behaviors, Applying Behavioral Psychology on Myself.
Story 1:
On Skype with Eliezer, I said: "Eliezer, you've been unusually pleasant these past three weeks. I'm really happy to see that, and moreover, it increases my probability than an Eliezer-led FAI research team will work. What caused this change, do you think?"
Eliezer replied: "Well, three weeks ago I was working with Anna and Alicorn, and every time I said something nice they fed me an M&M."
Story 2:
I once witnessed a worker who hated keeping a work log because it was only used "against" him. His supervisor would call to say "Why did you spend so much time on that?" or "Why isn't this done yet?" but never "I saw you handled X, great job!" Not surprisingly, he often "forgot" to fill out his worklog.
Ever since I got everyone at the Singularity Institute to keep work logs, I've tried to avoid connections between "concerned" feedback and staff work logs, and instead take time to comment positively on things I see in those work logs.
Story 3:
Chatting with Eliezer, I said, "Eliezer, I get the sense that I've inadvertently caused you to be slightly averse to talking to me. Maybe because we disagree on so many things, or something?"
Eliezer's reply was: "No, it's much simpler. Our conversations usually run longer than our previously set deadline, so whenever I finish talking with you I feel drained and slightly cranky."
Now I finish our conversations on time.
Story 4:
A major Singularity Institute donor recently said to me: "By the way, I decided that every time I donate to the Singularity Institute, I'll set aside an additional 5% for myself to do fun things with, as a motivation to donate."
The power of reinforcement
It's amazing to me how consistently we fail to take advantage of the power of reinforcement.
Maybe it's because behaviorist techniques like reinforcement feel like they don't respect human agency enough. But if you aren't treating humans more like animals than most people are, then you're modeling humans poorly.
You are not an agenty homunculus "corrupted" by heuristics and biases. You just are heuristics and biases. And you respond to reinforcement, because most of your motivation systems still work like the motivation systems of other animals.
A quick reminder of what you learned in high school
What works
Example applications
For additional examples and studies, see The Power of Reinforcement (2004), Don't Shoot the Dog (2006), and Learning and Behavior (2008).
I close with Story 5, from Amy Sutherland:
Next post: Rational Romantic Relationships Part 1
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My thanks to Erica Edelman for doing much of the research for this post.