Elo comments on The Winding Path - Less Wrong

6 Post author: OrphanWilde 24 November 2015 09:23PM

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Comment author: Elo 24 November 2015 10:23:48PM 4 points [-]

I found some of this hard to parse;

Just as the supernatural is a non-explanation of unexplained phenomena, superstition is a non-explanation of causal relationships; it is the recognition of them, without the attribution of cause.

not sure if it's the syllables; or the word length (or word use) or the switch between negatives and non-negatives; but this sentence was hard to read.

Try this:

Just as the idea of "supernatural" is not an explanation of mysterious phenomena, superstition is not an explanation of causal relationships; it is a recognition of a relationship; without trying to name the cause.

(not sure if it's better)

I enjoyed the read once I made sure to read it carefully a second time.

Comment author: OrphanWilde 25 November 2015 04:21:02PM *  1 point [-]

Adjusting! Thank you.

ETA: Corrected some related issues with poor phrasing, particularly implications I didn't intend to imply.