If I used the same metrics that are used to get the "XX% of women are domestically abused!!!!!" talking points, I myself would be a victim of domestic violence, but I am not.

I think that is an overly subjective judgement. I have met people who have experienced what I would consider abuse if it happened to me, but who don't consider it abuse.

Reasonable estimates of what percent of women who have been victims of what is normally thought of when the phrase "Domestic Violence" is used, stuff worth doing something about --not being pushed out the way once in your life--, is very small and not more than a few percentage points.

I just use the "modern" definition which includes physical, emotional, sexual, verbal, and economic abuse. There are extreme forms of all of these types of violence, as well as occasional and mild forms. All of them have negative utility, but I agree there is a significant difference between patriarchal terrorism and a single instance of mild abuse in a lifetime. I also don't think the survey results for rape and attempted rape are related to the CTS surveys in the article you referenced.