Similarly, women don't necessarily want to be abused. But some quality that women want very much correlates strongly with being abusive. They have to figure out what it is, and give it up. Or keep it, and stop complaining.

To paraphrase a discussion that went on in a different thread a few months ago... Nerds in school don't necessarily want to be bullied. But they do want to study physics and watch anime, which correlates strongly with being bullied. They have to give it up. Or keep it, and stop complaining.

Don't get me wrong: I'm not saying that if a woman finds that sexy non-abusive men are rare and usually already taken, then the best thing she could do is whine about it; but I can see where she's coming from, and I wouldn't blame her if she doesn't unreluctantly opt to pursue a non-abusive man even if he's not sexy, even though it may be the least of three evils. (The women I personally know typically opt to stay single until the right man comes along, but they might not be representative of the population in general.)

I bet that some female enjoyment of abuse goes way back in mammalian evolution. It's common in mammals for "courtship" of a female to consist of a strange new male beating up and driving off the female's mate, then killing her children, then immediately mating with her. Evolution must have programmed females to be sexually receptive to this.

Downvoted for this alone. What people want and why they evolved to want that are separate questions.