I don't have the answer but would be extremely interested in knowing it.
(Sorry this comment isn't more helpful. I am trying to get better at publicly acknowledging when I don't know an answer to a useful question in the hopes that this will reduce the sting of it.)
Is there a name for the (I claim) extremely common practice of blithely and unconsciously always looking at your own view (political especially) in terms of its best possible outcomes, while always characterizing an opposing point of view by its worst possibilities?
If not, I think there should be. It seems like a major major source of unfruitful argumentation.