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Qiaochu_Yuan comments on How to Not Get Offended - Less Wrong
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Agreed. I worry that not getting offended because it doesn't seem epistemically useful may come at the expense of not using a social tool which is instrumentally useful for dealing with people. (Getting offended on the internet is probably still a terrible idea - there are good reasons why people's instincts about what they should be offended at could be miscalibrated for online communication - but I think IRL it can still be valuable.)
I agree with this assessment. My evaluation is that it is an open question whether or not not getting offended sacrifices one's ability to effectively use the social tool of acting offended in person. My impression is that it does not but I am far from confident in this and in particular think that the answer is unlikely to be the same for all individuals.