I thought you would be able to interpret that as "all of it" and be able to find the obvious reasons why, but ok.
So, what specific behaviors did you have in mind?
I behave differently around groups of young men like myself, at company meetings, when visiting a synagogue, at family gatherings, with friends, at dinner with a family of asian immigrants, at bars, with strangers...
I will behave differently around feminists and strict conservatives. I will behave differently with a group of black strangers. I use background knowledge and empathy to make my adjustments, usually automatically - the automatic process only being sufficiently reliable in relatively familiar situations. An example: if at any point you become tempted to defend "race realism" or talk about how not racist you are, you're probably doing it wrong. If you are at any point accused of racism, you're probably doing something wrong, but even if you weren't, don't argue. Black people don't usually like white strangers appointing themselves the local expert on white-on-black racism. If you get as nervous as Derbyshire, it might be best to follow his advice and avoid such situations. If you're new to it, be prepared to make mistakes however well-intentioned you are. The key is owning up to them when you make them. Most of all, remember that the point of your being there is to share in some common activity with your fellow human beings.
A note from personal experience: like most groups of young men, young black men like ribbing each other. If you can't keep your cool, you're in for a hard time. 99% of the soured situations I've seen have run as follows: me and other white dude and some black guys are hanging out, having a good time, trading jokes, and killing brain cells. Black guy makes a joke at other white dude's expense, and the other white dude can't keep chill. I swear you can see the bullseye appearing on his forehead as soon as he starts. Everybody notices instantly, and it's all downhill from there.
My advice is almost entirely commonsensical, and your experience may vary.
Yes, if you insist of seeing X in everything, it's not hard to miss the X "underline" in everything, whether X is racism, Illuminati influence, or the hand of Satan.
Yeah, seeing racism in US politics is like seeing Illuminati. I don't think I can improve this one for you.
In particular recognizing difference in behavior between people of different races (even if one isn't willing to consciously admit the difference for fear of being "racist") is system 1.
It is system 1. There are behavioral differences. I don't think we're as panic-stricken as you think we are.
Somehow this effect didn't seem to stop Asians.
Because the stereotypical Asian is a subhuman, primitive brute incapable of self-control, especially around white women. Also, descendant of slaves.
My advice is almost entirely commonsensical, and your experience may vary.
Here's a fun exercise. Try going to your nearest black underclass neighborhood, preferably at night. See how well this advice serves you.
I don't think we're as panic-stricken as you think we are.
This seems like a total non sequitur.
Because the stereotypical Asian is a subhuman, primitive brute incapable of self-control, especially around white women.
A century ago this was much closer to the standard stereotype.
Related: Heuristics for Evaluating the Soundness of the Academic Mainstream, Admitting to Bias, The Ideological Turing Test