One point you don't address: While you justify the claim that intelligence is real thing and can be compared, you don't explain why it would be measurable in a numerical scale. In particular, I don't see what "linear increase in intelligence" and "exponential increase in intelligence" mean and how they can be compared.
Stylistically, I agree with many of the other comments and I think this paper is unsuitable for academic publication. You should keep out discussion of side issues like speculation on the bottlenecks in academic research, how MIRI plans to deal with the potential intelligence explosion, and general discussions on how to reason, and focus just on the arguments for the existence and on the nature of an intelligence explosion.
Summary: Intelligence Explosion Microeconomics (pdf) is 40,000 words taking some initial steps toward tackling the key quantitative issue in the intelligence explosion, "reinvestable returns on cognitive investments": what kind of returns can you get from an investment in cognition, can you reinvest it to make yourself even smarter, and does this process die out or blow up? This can be thought of as the compact and hopefully more coherent successor to the AI Foom Debate of a few years back.
(Sample idea you haven't heard before: The increase in hominid brain size over evolutionary time should be interpreted as evidence about increasing marginal fitness returns on brain size, presumably due to improved brain wiring algorithms; not as direct evidence about an intelligence scaling factor from brain size.)
I hope that the open problems posed therein inspire further work by economists or economically literate modelers, interested specifically in the intelligence explosion qua cognitive intelligence rather than non-cognitive 'technological acceleration'. MIRI has an intended-to-be-small-and-technical mailing list for such discussion. In case it's not clear from context, I (Yudkowsky) am the author of the paper.
Abstract:
The dedicated mailing list will be small and restricted to technical discussants.
This topic was originally intended to be a sequence in Open Problems in Friendly AI, but further work produced something compacted beyond where it could be easily broken up into subposts.
Outline of contents:
1: Introduces the basic questions and the key quantitative issue of sustained reinvestable returns on cognitive investments.
2: Discusses the basic language for talking about the intelligence explosion, and argues that we should pursue this project by looking for underlying microfoundations, not by pursuing analogies to allegedly similar historical events.
3: Goes into detail on what I see as the main arguments for a fast intelligence explosion, constituting the bulk of the paper with the following subsections:
4: A tentative methodology for formalizing theories of the intelligence explosion - a project of formalizing possible microfoundations and explicitly stating their alleged relation to historical experience, such that some possibilities can allegedly be falsified.
5: Which open sub-questions seem both high-value and possibly answerable.
6: Formally poses the Open Problem and mentions what it would take for MIRI itself to directly fund further work in this field.