RichardKennaway comments on Bad Concepts Repository - Less Wrong

20 Post author: moridinamael 27 June 2013 03:16AM

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Comment author: RichardKennaway 27 June 2013 09:54:31AM 0 points [-]

"Come to terms with." Just update already. See also "seeking closure", "working through", "processing", all of which pieces of psychobabble are ways of clinging to not updating already.

Comment author: sixes_and_sevens 27 June 2013 10:03:48AM 15 points [-]

I would agree with this if I didn't have a human brain that got stuck to past events.

Comment author: Armok_GoB 29 June 2013 10:06:30PM 4 points [-]

I always assumed it stood for "I have updated on that specific belief, but I have to also go through all the myriad connected ones and re-evaluating them, and then seeing how it all propagates back, and iterate this until the web is relaxed, and this will take a while because I have limited clock speed."

Comment author: TimS 28 June 2013 02:30:41AM 1 point [-]

In parallel to what sixes is saying, be careful about conflating "closure" and "working through."

Closure: comes from an external source - can be unhealthy to pursue because you cannot force another person / entity to give whatever "it" is to you.

Working through it: comes from an internal process - can be healthy if done successfully.

In practice, effectively coming to terms with some loss involves shifting from seeking closure to working through the loss.