I endorse this theory and it all adds up to normality: in the end, the theories that you offer as alternatives are all true. (I have not read anything other than your comment.)
How can they, if they're mutually exclusive?
Whew, Karma. Also, why did this get downvoted so much? I'd appreciate the skepticism a lot more in the form of an argument. (No, seriously, I'd appreciate skeptical argument way more than any abstract philosophical argument should be appreciated)
If it's worth saying, but not worth its own post (even in Discussion), then it goes here.