Agreed that you have to be very careful about letting your answers to (1) slide into your answers to (2). But I don't think you c an do th

If she places very little internal value on clean dishes, she may not be able to relate to the mind of an agent who places any value on washed dishes. She may even be modeling you as a non-agent with a quirky response to the stimulus "dirty-dishes".

Oh, she likes clean dishes all right. She nagged me about them plenty. It was just that her usual response to dirty dishes was "it's too ughy to go in the kitchen so I just won't cook either." She actually verbalized this to me at some point. She also said (not in so many words) that she would prefer to be the sort of person who just washed dishes and got on with life. So there was more to "what she said" than saying to me that she would wash the dishes (which someone who didn't care about dishes might say anyway for social reasons).

Obviously all people are agents to some degree, and can be agents to different degrees on different days depending on, say, tiredness or whether they're around their parents. (I become noticeably less agenty around mine). But these distinctions aren't actually what my brain perceives; my brain latches onto some information that in retrospect is probably relevant, like my roommate saying she wants to be the sort of person who just washes dishes but not washing any dishes, and things that aren't relevant to agentiness, like impressiveness.