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Ben_LandauTaylor comments on Use Your Identity Carefully - Less Wrong
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Comments (33)
I don't really think of my identity when I do things. I don't notice it at all.
I just assume I'm always in a calm analytic mode of thinking, even when I subconsciously know that's not the case.
Others view my identity with disgust and immediately dismiss what I have to say. I'm not really sure anything would help bring my point across correctly.
There will always be people who don't have time for you and aren't in a learning mindset, or just don't see you as anything other than an antagonist when you start trying to have a real conversation or suggest new things.
I probably should just avoid those people, and stop trying to convince people in general unless I have a pretty good chance of success, but my entire life is built around convincing others. I'd be happier not having this goal, but I still have it.
I just don't know how to approach a life without standpoints and arguing. It's not something I've built myself for. I don't know where to start and I don't know how to have a good time starting.
It'd be great if there was help for this, or some guiding light for approaching this. I honestly just am lost at this point.
I think you're describing a different issue than I was, or possibly a different facet of the same issue. It looks like you're talking about the signals we send to others, while this essay was about the signals we send to ourselves. In both cases, being aware of those signals is probably the single most important step.
I don't understand what you mean by "standpoints and arguing," here. I might or might not be able to help if I had a better idea what you were looking for.