I don't exclude that possibility. In fact, I'd say the "magical component" to romantic love does predate movies and TV. It predates all fiction, I'd imagine. Cave men fell in love and then made drawings about it on the cave walls. And then some other cave men came along and misunderstood the drawing when they compared their comparitively stale relationships with their cave women to the Storybook Romance depicted on the walls.
Even without the recorded idealization, I think people do chase the highs of love and infatuation based on their personal idealizations, and it hurts their chances of finding a fulfilling lorn-term romantic relationship. But Hollywood is loud & everywhere. And lots and lots of people are really bad at distinguishing fiction from reality. So, if you havne't created an unrealistic view of love on your own, then there are movies and TV shows and books eveywhere ready to help you get infected by irrational expectations.
I'd say the "magical component" to romantic love does predate movies and TV. It predates all fiction, I'd imagine. Cave men fell in love and then made drawings about it on the cave walls.
Sexual attraction (and the central nervous system consequences thereof) predates humans.
However as far as I can recall the concept of "romantic love" and specifically the notion of the sequence romantic love -> marriage -> live happily ever after, this notion was the product of the European Middle Ages.
Note that outside of the Western countries the idea that one should marry one's romantic love interest is not widespread.
Hi,
what good movies can you suggest that give ideas or inspirations on how to be more rational?
I just watched [Memento](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memento_%28film%29) last night and I was very impressed.
(No spoilers in this post)
The main character is a guy who suffers from amnesia, he forgets everything after a couple minutes so he has developed a system to cope with it. He takes pictures and writes notes. E.g. when staying at a hotel he takes a picture of it and put it in his pocket. So later when he doesnt know where he is staying he searches his pockets, finds the picture of the hotel and then he knows.
What I learned
I identified with the character in the movie because in spite of not having amnesia my memory as everyone elses isn't perfect either and I have all the quirks(biases) of a normal human brain. I cant exactly remember what I did last Thursday at 3 PM. Do I actually know why I am doing what Im doing or why I believe what I believe? I may have good rationalizations for both, of course, but that doesnt mean they are the real reasons.
I like to read LW but I havent developed much of a system to actually be more rational. If anyone has, I would be eager to read about it.
Practical Advice
What system could I develop to be more rational? One thing that a lot of management experts(e.g. Peter Drucker) have already pointed out is to write down how we actually spend our time because often how we spend it is not how we think we spend it and we end up spending much more time on unproductive activities than we are aware of. How much time went into random internet browsing last week?
I will start an activity log during work: how much time Im spending on what. This will be a first step.