Looks like they never had true chemistry.
Along time ago we consciously noticed that and tried to work around it. And we saw some improvements. But not enough to counter her dissatisfaction. And surely not enough to counter infatuation esp. as it was mutual.
at least he gets a chance to experience the same when it's genuinely reciprocated.
Now that I know much more about these processes I wonder how I can hack them such as to maximize the chance of finding someone to mututally fall in love with. And I mean genuinely.
I tried to estimate the likelihood two 'random' people match in chemistry and 'infatuability'. I came up with numbers in the range of 1:20 to 1:150 for each and wonder about the correlation. As I carefully kept the ability to trigger feelings of infatuation (at least a psychophysical fragment of it) I hope that I can improve chances. Maybe I will write a post on that some time.
I find it interesting that on The Bachelor/ette, it's quite rare for any of the women (or, on The Bachelorette. the men) to say "Meh, I'm not into you". Maybe they just don't show it, but it seems like all of the women want to stay. And the bachelor usually finds it difficult to send the women home. It's a highly artificial situation, and the women may be confusing their competitive drive to "win" for an interest specific to the man, but it does seem like a large percentage of pairings, in the right situation, can become infatuated.
This is the earlier promised post about Dealing with a Major Personal Crisis. Please continue reading there but comment here.
The reasons for posting it this way are explained at the end of the link. I hope this approach does what I want it to.