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seez comments on Don't rely on the system to guarantee you life satisfaction - Less Wrong
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What if it doesn't come naturally?
I don't know, but a serious attempt to learn social skills as well as possible seems likely to be a worthwhile endeavour, since they are useful in so many different endeavours.
Problem is, most high school denizens don't have the slightest idea what a "serious attempt to learn social skills" even remotely looks like, let alone know how to go about it.
Hindsight says studying politics, monkey tribes, evpsych and game theory together with occasional experimentation outside of the main / high school community are probably the better way to go if you're not socially gifted but at least moderately smart.
However, my first thoughts about politics and monkeys in high school were most definitely not "Yay better ways to make people help me!". And I wasn't aware at all that I didn't even know about the existence of the field of game theory, and only peripherally aware that some evolution research might touch on psychological and social issues.
None of which is intended as a counterargument, mind you. It's just that dropping "learn social skills" without something to support it, preferably a whole coursework guide including the above material, seems to me like it would only do more harm than good by way of wasting the student's time they could spend studying other, easier things, while they'd learn good skills more easily later once they became more aware of things. Or, at least, that's what seems to me to be happening most often.
I actually don't think that game theory helps with winning friends. It's useful to prevent other people from bullying yourself but it doesn't make people like you.
Teaching kids nonviolent communication is something I would consider much more effective to create a good social environment. Whether it's a benefit from a single kid alone to learn it might depend on the amount of hostility in the school enviroment.
Game Theory per-se won't help with winning friends, but it does wonders at helping one analyze and plan strategies about political landscapes in the general sense, including the tribal and clique networks of highschool in the specific.
Dealing with negative shenanigans is definitely its primary strongpoint, but that in itself can be counted as removing obstacles or negative influences on winning friends. Which, in my interpretation, is equivalent to pouncing on those opportunity costs and making a profit.
I don't think the essay should include a description of how to gain social skills (unless the authors know a much better way of doing this than I do). I just think the essay should NOT say "don't worry about social skills or popularity". Depending on one's desired career, those skills can range from useful to necessary. Also, encouraging kids to only spend time with those they "like" often leads to them spending time only with those from similar backgrounds, with similar interests, which often limits their perspective and social flexibility.