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btrettel comments on Open Thread for February 18-24 2014 - Less Wrong
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Ask this: "Name some things your partner can do to make you feel appreciated." If the person answers the question at all and does so in a useful way, that should tell you something about their communication style.
That would be a good way to determine someone's communication style, but unfortunately that question is too open ended for OkCupid. Perhaps you are unfamiliar with the site. "Questions" on there refer to a set of questions with specific answers, exactly like those in this comment.
Ah, I see. So we're looking for a multiple choice question to test whether someone is willing to volunteer unsolicited information.