Last month I finally succeeded in doing active listening. Really active listening with almost all the bells and whistles. Not interrupting. Accepting to be interrupted. Emphatic responses. Mirroring posture and gestures.
It was in two instances so far that I really was in the flow with it. In these cases it did lead to great results. Sure things can always be improved but I'm proud of it nonetheless. In all these years the many times before I tried it something was always missing or it fell to pieces too quickly.
I think the key it does work for me now is that I understand the process better and in more detail. I can reflect it during the process. I really perform better in most things if I first build a complex intuitive model of what to do beforehand. The knowledge and experience accumulated and finally passed the critical level. Significant part had the books I read about it - and did the exercises. The Charisma Myth being the last but not the least (it has lots of exercises).
Today I got a surprise confirmation of this. I received personal feedback that my personal skills and in particular active listening improved in the last four months (withou being prompted or primed about this). Made me quite happy. And I promptly applied the advice for receiving compliments:
Stop, absorb the compliment, let that show on your face, and thank them
From https://github.com/mgp/book-notes/blob/master/the-charisma-myth.markdown
Your job, should you choose to accept it, is to comment on this thread explaining the most awesome thing you've done this month. You may be as blatantly proud of yourself as you feel. You may unabashedly consider yourself the coolest freaking person ever because of that awesome thing you're dying to tell everyone about. This is the place to do just that.
Remember, however, that this isn't any kind of progress thread. Nor is it any kind of proposal thread. This thread is solely for people to talk about the awesome things they have done. Not "will do". Not "are working on". Have already done. This is to cultivate an environment of object level productivity rather than meta-productivity methods.
So, what's the coolest thing you've done this month?