which should be mildly embarassing. Along with values hardcoded as numbers in the body of the function, etc. I can read (and write) R code just fine -- what is it that you consider to be "unusually high quality"?

I was just learning R at the time and in a rush to get things to work. The code itself is not high quality.

What is this shit about trying to guilt me into agreement because you sacrifice so much of your highly valuable utils and hedons only because you care?

I see that you don't know what you're missing, I know it's because you didn't have the environmental advantages that I did, I know that I could have been in your position if not for the luck of the draw, and so I have pangs of sympathy for you, because your situation is in some sense very close to my own. It would make me feel so good if I could help you. That's why it's worth it to me in expectation, even if it's unpleasant in real time.

But you can't love someone who doesn't want you to love him/her. I spent ~15 years on that and it helped no one and came at great cost to my myself. So I'll withdraw from this conversation.