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LessWrong comments on Base your self-esteem on your rationality - Less Wrong
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I wanted to post a comment about my disagreement with many "self-[stuff]" concepts, that are so commonly appear in various self-help media. I consider them extremely harmful. To me, those concepts are on the same plane as any spiritual stuff.
But I can't really write a more detailed comment than the paragraph above because.. I never really thought about self-esteem before I heard the word and subsequently the definition. From what I see though, it's seemingly a never ending maze of finding something.. but.. I can't be sure of what to find and where to find it. There's a very noticeable lack of clarity, as if magic is supposed to happen by invoking certain rituals. At least it's how the self-help books describe it. In practical terms, I seem to lack any perception of self-esteem.
Does anyone else share the same sentiment?
Self-esteem is just how you think about yourself and how you view your interaction with the world as well as the conceptions you have of yourself that make up your internal dialogue about yourself. It is deeply cultural and is also based on a host of things like how you grew up, your perceived gender, and much more. If you don't have a very high opinion of yourself it can be hell to raise it. In fact, I would say that if you don't start out with a decent amount of self-esteem it's about impossible to build back up. Indeed the old saying goes, "It's easier to raise quality kids than fix broken adults."
I guess I'm not a good representative if this is true on average. I'm not experienced enough with psychology/neurology to actually suggest anything. On the other hand I could but it's not that the odds are against me, they're totally unknown to me.
I would say at least in cursory observations of people that is true, but then I also think there is environmental considerations. Broken people tend to hang out together creating a greater case for it. Well-adjusted people tend to hang out with like people. I'm sure that if I were a totally well-adjusted person and hung out with less damaged souls then I would have an idea of it being far lower or very exceptional. Whereas, because I tend to hang out with people that have similar backgrounds to my own it seems higher. Its the fish tank effect.