I suffer under no delusion that I'm a morally perfect individual.

You seem to believe that to identify what's the morally correct path, one must also be willing to follow it. Morality pushes our wills towards that direction, but selfishness has its own role to play and here it pushes elsewhere.

But yes, I am willing to say that I should submit to 50 years of torture in order to save 3^^^3 people getting dust specks in their eyes. I'll also openly admit that that I am not willing to submit to such. This is not contradictory: "should" is a moral judgment, but being willing to be moral at such high cost is another thing entirely.