Ask OB: Leaving the Fold

Eliezer Yudkowsky

I thought this comment from "Jo" deserved a bump to the front page:

"So here I am having been raised in the Christian faith and trying not to freak out over the past few weeks because I've finally begun to wonder whether I believe things just because I was raised with them. Our family is surrounded by genuinely wonderful people who have poured their talents into us since we were teenagers, and our social structure and business rests on the tenets of what we believe. I've been trying to work out how I can 'clear the decks' and then rebuild with whatever is worth keeping, yet it's so foundational that it will affect my marriage (to a pretty special man) and my daughters who, of course, have also been raised to walk the Christian path.

Is there anyone who's been in this position - really, really invested in a faith and then walked away?"

Handling this kind of situation has to count as part of the art. But I haven't gone through anything like this. Can anyone with experience advise Jo on what to expect, what to do, and what not to do?

Followup to: Crisis of Faith

I thought this comment from "Jo" deserved a bump to the front page:

"So here I am having been raised in the Christian faith and trying not to freak out over the past few weeks because I've finally begun to wonder whether I believe things just because I was raised with them. Our family is surrounded by genuinely wonderful people who have poured their talents into us since we were teenagers, and our social structure and business rests on the tenets of what we believe. I've been trying to work out how I can 'clear the decks' and then rebuild with whatever is worth keeping, yet it's so foundational that it will affect my marriage (to a pretty special man) and my daughters who, of course, have also been raised to walk the Christian path.

Is there anyone who's been in this position - really, really invested in a faith and then walked away?"

Handling this kind of situation has to count as part of the art. But I haven't gone through anything like this. Can anyone with experience advise Jo on what to expect, what to do, and what not to do?

I just started reading OB, so I am not sure if I am a rationalist by this blog's definition. However, I do try to be think about my decisions and pick the rational choice.

I grew up in an accepting Christian family where discussion was encouraged, instead of being indoctrinated into a religion with little room to question.

I have now evolved into believing in the idea of good and of trying to do good. In my mind God= good, therefore I believe in God. This idea fits into several religions. In context of Christianity, the main point of dissent is Jesus. However, I believe in the idea that we are not perfect and can be more good than we are now. This is the idea behind redemption, and the idea behind Jesus.

I share these beliefs with those who ask my opinion on religion, but I don't participate in these types of discussions with extended family because I want to love them in the short amount of time I spend with them, not create conflict.

In your own family, however, you can create a safe environment to question anything and everything. Discussions like these can refine ideas and the ability to communicate ideas. Both of these things are valueable for all parties involved.

15

Ask OB: Leaving the Fold

15

15

15

Ask OB: Leaving the Fold

15

15