Ask OB: Leaving the Fold

Eliezer Yudkowsky

I thought this comment from "Jo" deserved a bump to the front page:

"So here I am having been raised in the Christian faith and trying not to freak out over the past few weeks because I've finally begun to wonder whether I believe things just because I was raised with them. Our family is surrounded by genuinely wonderful people who have poured their talents into us since we were teenagers, and our social structure and business rests on the tenets of what we believe. I've been trying to work out how I can 'clear the decks' and then rebuild with whatever is worth keeping, yet it's so foundational that it will affect my marriage (to a pretty special man) and my daughters who, of course, have also been raised to walk the Christian path.

Is there anyone who's been in this position - really, really invested in a faith and then walked away?"

Handling this kind of situation has to count as part of the art. But I haven't gone through anything like this. Can anyone with experience advise Jo on what to expect, what to do, and what not to do?

Followup to: Crisis of Faith

I thought this comment from "Jo" deserved a bump to the front page:

"So here I am having been raised in the Christian faith and trying not to freak out over the past few weeks because I've finally begun to wonder whether I believe things just because I was raised with them. Our family is surrounded by genuinely wonderful people who have poured their talents into us since we were teenagers, and our social structure and business rests on the tenets of what we believe. I've been trying to work out how I can 'clear the decks' and then rebuild with whatever is worth keeping, yet it's so foundational that it will affect my marriage (to a pretty special man) and my daughters who, of course, have also been raised to walk the Christian path.

Is there anyone who's been in this position - really, really invested in a faith and then walked away?"

Handling this kind of situation has to count as part of the art. But I haven't gone through anything like this. Can anyone with experience advise Jo on what to expect, what to do, and what not to do?

Best of luck, it's painful, but you can definitely come through this with renewed zest for life, the universe and your fellow humans.

I've not written down my deconversion process yet, but plan too. Others have given the links to the deconversion stories, but this one was very interesting from the point of view of someone heavily involved in christian mission. There may be answers in here that help you: http://www.geocities.com/kenandcharlene/Testimony.htm

This is Ken Daniels, author of the article you referenced. Thanks for posting the link. Geocities (the site that hosts my online story) is going away on October 26, 2009. This is just to let you know the new home for my story is http://kwdaniels.com/story/DanielsStory.htm. My homepage is now http://kwdaniels.com.

Thanks,

Ken

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Ask OB: Leaving the Fold

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Ask OB: Leaving the Fold

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