Stephen Bond writes the definitive word on ad hominem in "the ad hominem fallacy fallacy":
In reality, ad hominem is unrelated to sarcasm or personal abuse. Argumentum ad hominem is the logical fallacy of attempting to undermine a speaker's argument by attacking the speaker instead of addressing the argument. The mere presence of a personal attack does not indicate ad hominem: the attack must be used for the purpose of undermining the argument, or otherwise the logical fallacy isn't there.
[...]
A: "All rodents are mammals, but a weasel isn't a rodent, so it can't be a mammal."
B: "You evidently know nothing about logic. This does not logically follow."B's argument is still not ad hominem. B does not imply that A's sentence does not logically follow because A knows nothing about logic. B is still addressing the substance of A's argument...
This is too beautiful, thorough, and precise to not post. HT to sfk on HN.
Off topic, but Eliezer, I think you have to read this paper immediately. I don't know how else to bring this to your attention, so I'm posting it here.
Layman's version: http://www.livescience.com/strangenews/081024-sb-theory-of-everything.html
I haven't read the actual paper, but it seems like something that could be very important.