This is an incredibly tough situation. I've been listening to the podcast of the Austin public-access TV show The Atheist Experience, and this question - what do I do, now that I no longer believe? - is something that a lot of people have struggled, are struggling, and will struggle with.

I have very little to offer, being a lifelong atheist in a non-religious family in a non-religious region; the closest I have been to your experience is being a closet atheist in the Boy Scouts of America (the national organization of which is anti-atheistic). There, I was "not religious" but respectful and willing to bow my head from the start. Not all that applicable.

I'd very much appreciate suggestions for dealing with my intellectual insecurity. How could I be more at ease? When can one rationally conclude that they've "done enough", at least for the present moment and apply their energies elsewhere?

This reminds me of a remark SarahC alluded to recently - an idea she had back when she first deconverted:

It occurred to me that nothing I actually revere could object to me responding to the evidence of my eyes and mind. I can't help doing that. It can't possibly be blameworthy.

I don't know if anything I have said was helpful, but I'm glad to talk more if you want.