At this point I'm just kind of confused about what your questions are getting at. I'm not offended or anything. This just isn't the kind of feedback I was expecting to "Therapy didn't work for me, but I'd love to hear about how it worked for you, if you can be really specific."
I want to be more resilient in the face of failure and of people being mean to me. And my episodes of major depression have usually been precipitated by environmental factors, but I suspect based on their repeated ocurrence and my family history that I do have a biological predisposition for depression. I am currently feeling fine, but I consider it quite probable that if I were subjected to a significant environmental challenge, I would have to seek treatment again.
So when you were in therapy, you tended to talk a lot about your problems and how you conceptualized them, and the therapist would point out more dots to connect? Or just ask useful questions that helped you notice more dots? Or how did you find the extra dots?
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Like many people here, I think a lot about how to become more awesome. I'm fairly optimistic about my chances, because I can clearly remember times in the past when I was less awesome than I am now-- not necessarily less rational, but less productive and with fewer relevant skills.1
So I've been thinking about what changes I believe have most improved my effectiveness, changes which have caused me to learn many useful things and/or greatly increased my productive capacity. I found the list interesting:
Things which are notably not on the list:
So how have you actually improved your own effectiveness?
1 Some of these less-awesome past versions of me suffered from clinical depression, but the last time I had a major episode of depression I was able to deal with it much more purposefully than in the past and still accomplish a large percentage of the shit I was supposed to be doing, so I think there has been improvement independent of my state of mental health.
2 Major consequences for failure seem to be very effective motivators, but since I want to undertake projects that are difficult enough to have a significant chance of failure, I would like these consequences to be highly motivating without being horribly costly, if possible. Ideas?
3 I have learned a lot from pleasure reading, but I'm not sure how much was actually useful, and since I've been reading for pleasure since I can remember there's no easy before-and-after comparison to make.