orthonormal comments on [LINK] High school students coerced into non-optimal philanthropy via psychological warfare - Less Wrong Discussion
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"I applaud everyone's altruism, but I'm donating the same amount to charity X instead because I think it does even more good, and I invite others to join me" is, I think, a way to talk about efficient charity without being a party pooper.
(I noticed, while writing this, the vast gulf in connotation between saying "X does more good" and "X does even more good", so tact is important.)