There's a lot to process here, but: I hear you. As you investigate your path, just remember that a) paths that involve doing what you love should be favored as you decide what to do with yourself, because depression and boredom do not a productive person make, and b) if you can make a powerful impact in gaming, you can still translate that impact into an impact on FAI by converting your success and labor into dollars. I expect these are clear to you, but bear mentioning explicitly.

These decisions are hard but important. Those who take their goals seriously must choose their paths carefully. Remember that the community is here for you, so you aren't alone.